RANT: My Husband is a Big Fat Dork

To be fair, my husband is actually a pretty skinny dork...

ANYWAYS, we were out having a nice dinner at one of our favorite local DC restaurants, Arucola, when my husband (The Dork) leans over and whispers, "don't look now... but Gordon Peterson is sitting behind you!"

If you have ever read his blog, you know that he is a huge fan of local "celebrities", or as he likes to say, "Institutions". Gordon Peterson qualifies as one of these "institutions". He wouldn't go up and say hi to him, but he did finally muster the courage to take his picture over my shoulder. So most of the picture looks like me giving him a very skeptical look while Gordon P. is in mid-story telling to his table. After we left I almost sent him into a fit saying things like, "are you sure that was Gordon Peterson?" (he did a side-by-side photo from Channel 7's web site when we got home) and "why do you care so much about the weather man?" (Gordon is 5/6 o'clock anchor).

Ah, the joys of being married to a local news-cast enthusiast...
if you are not a DC local, go here to see who I am talking about:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gordon_Peterson

RAVE: Coffee Love Affair

Ode to Coffee

Smell makes me smile

Touch takes the cold

Taste wakes me up

RANT: Delilah Hosts WASH FM'S Valentine's Day Ball

I heard on the radio last night that Delilah will be hosting the annual WASH FM Valentine's Day Ball in DC instead of Glenn Hollis. "Hosted by me, Delilah!" Gag.

Who would want to spend Valentine's Day with Delilah, listening to her go on and on while you are trying to have a good time. The whole thing is just to awful to think about. That After Hours could go on without Glenn H. is bad enough, but now they are taking the Valentine's Day Ball too? WTF?! I hope they don't sell any tickets.

RAVE: Stevens and Berdosky Are My Heros

Sean Stevens and Peter Berdovsky are my new personal heros. These two pled not guilty today to charges that they placed "hoax devices" in Boston after putting up what look like 80s style Lite Brites around Boston to advertise for an Adult Swim cartoon. An element of this offense is that they had to intend to incite panic, which they were clearly not doing if they were putting them up because they are employees of an advertising agency/marketing firm.

In a news conference after they posted bail, they were accused of not taking the situation seriously when they told reports they would only answer questions about 70s style hair cuts. They responded that they were taking it very seriously. When asked another question not involving hair, they said the reporters were obviously not taking them seriously for asking a question that did not involve hair.

Besides the hair questions, my favorite part of the story on cnn quotes Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley as saying as saying these lite bright cartoon characters, "it had a very sinister appearance, it had a battery behind it, and wires." WTF. Do we call the cops on everything we see with batteries and wires? If so my office should be swarming with the closest SWAT team.

Please (again) vote for my wish at /http://www.robinhoodfund.com/cast-your-votes/wish/id/1586

Rave: Voting Has Begun!

Per the excellent suggestion of Nox yesterday,here is a direct link to my wish: http://www.robinhoodfund.com/cast-your-votes/wish/id/1586

You cast your vote by clicking on the stars.

Thanks, and as I said yesterday, it's very appreciated. Besides, you know you are bored at work (and cnn/msn/boingboing doesn't update nearly often enough)
- your local DCTXn

RAVE: RobinHoodFund.com, please vote!

Yesterday I found a great website- robinhoodfund.com. You can enter a wish and, depending on how many people view your wish, you could have it granted. I entered a wish of "Paying off my student loans" under the name Mags (see previous entries of "Rant: Evil Student Loans" etc.). If you are bored at work/school/home today and would like to vote, please go to robinhood.com. I will post a direct link once it is up for voting. i think you might have to register for your vote/view to count, but it is quick and painless, requiring minimal details.

It only takes a few seconds and hey, it might actually work. At any rate, I really appreciate anyone who can take the time. Voting on my wish starts at noon today MST and lasts for the weeks.

DCTXn thanks you in her ever-continuing fight against The Man.

RANT: Petey Wheatstraw is NOT Dolemite

I was very excited this weekend because Netflix had finally sent a movie I have been eagerly awaiting to see- Dolemite, a classic blaxploitation cult film from 1975, starring and co-written by Rudy Ray Moore. Keep in mind I have never seen the movie, just heard about it. I was halfway through the movie before my husband says, "This cannot be Dolemite. They have not even mentioned Dolemite. And who is this Petey Wheatstraw character?"

Instead of sending us Dolemite, the Netflix people sent us Petey Wheatstraw (1977). I can understand the mistake- both starring Rudy Ray Moore, both blaxploitation, and Petey Wheatstraw (I learn from the DVD extras) is part of the "Dolemite Collection". Other movies that are part of the Dolemite Collection also include The Human Tornado and Disco Godfather. The Human Tornado apparently involves a Hamburger Pimp who kicks his own ass twice a day, so that's definately made it into my "must see" list.

While Petey Wheatstraw was very amusing, politically incorrect, great 70s costumes (lots of piping!) and an infectious theme song, I was more than a little disappointed that we didn't actually get Dolemite. But maybe this was fate's way of exposing me to the greater Dolemite collection.

"Petey Wheatstraw.... Petey Wheatstraw... the devil's son-in-law"

RANT: End of Passions

NBC, the wonderful network that has brought us such gems as "The Office," "My Name is Earl," and "Days of Our Lives" is bringing their popular daytime series "Passions" to an end this summer. While there may be many people out there who deny being a Passions fan, I am not one of them. I am not ashamed!

Passions started running when I was in college, and it was the first soap opera that I could actually get into such as: characters under the age of 50 who weren't rich socialities, people who actually worked at jobs (and didn't just talk about them), different races and ethnicities, and multi/mixed-racial couples.

Like a good soap opera, many of the same story lines that intrigued me during my college days are still in play: will Ethan and Teresa ever get together (also known as: can a Latina from the wrong side of the tracks teach a rich boy a thing or two about love? ) ; will the Crane empire come crashing down around their feet; will Kay and Miguel ever realize their love, or will that goodie two shoes Charity show up and ruin everything (again!)?

Farewell, Passions- maybe your ending is a sign of the times that the Passion-generation needs to also put aside childish things, like Timmy dolls, and grow up.

RAVE: Golden Globes

I know it's late and everyone is done talking about the Golden Globes, but I have to say I really enjoyed them. Fav moments: when America Ferrera won for best actress in a series in Ugly Betty; Hugh Laurie (as always) for best actor in House. How I love that man and his British sense of humor. *sigh*

My Best Dressed props goes to Tina Fey for her adoreable cocktail-length dress. I hate it when people wear things that look like ball gowns to these award shows- like Jennifer Love Hewitt. Ugh! It looked like something left over from some hideous princess prom sale gone awry.

As bad as JLH's dress was, the Worst Dressed goes to Cameron Diaz. WTF. I literally gasped and sat straight up off the couch when I saw her on stage wearing this monstrosity in white tulle and shame.

RANT: Dress Like a Man!

I have a *very special* rant today: men's clothing. Well, one piece of clothing in particular. Let me just put it this way: if you are a heterosexual male and you are NOT living in a) alaska or b) some other arctic climate, you SHOULD NOT be wearing a fur-lined hooded coat. OK? Got it? Women can wear it, gay men can wear it. If you are trying to date someone I know, don't wear it. Because then people will point at you and snicker behind your back. They might even make fun of you in their blog. You never know.

RAVE: Peep's Choice Awards

OK, not quite "as it happens," but I have to say: Halle Berry just won People's Choice Award for Female Action Hero and she looks SMOKING HOT. Seriously, she has a super hero bod and the mini skirt length gold dress she is wearing looks amazing. Who else looked awesome, you say? Vanessa Williams. What's the lesson here, people: "mixed race" people are obviously the most good looking, combining the best of what everyone has to offer. That's my story and I am sticking to it.

I am also glad to see that Hayden, who plays The Cheerleader on Heroes, is wearing a gorgeous AND age-appropriate dress that she looks quite glam in. Go girl.

Patrick Dempsy as McDreamy? Looked McDelicious getting his award for best male in TV drama. That's right. I said it. McDelicious.

What the hell is Kojo doing on TV anymore? Kojo should be banned from TV. He has no place on the airwaves, especially in high-def. You heard me.

Congrats Heroes on best new drama. SO deserved. I can't wait for it's return next week!

RANT: Rooney in DC, 1/10/07

I have just discovered that my arch-nemesis and general bain of my existence, Andy Rooney, will be in DC at Politics and Prose tomorrow night for a book signing. While generally weirded out that he will be but a few miles from where I work and live, I am strangely curious about what the crowd there will look like. Aptly enough, the book he wrote that he is signing is called Out of My Mind. Well, that's about right.

Part of me just wants to go to stand in line and ask, "Mr. Rooney, I am a big fan of yours. Please tell me how you get paid so much to talk about nothing for so little time every week?" I might get thrown out, but it would be worth it just for the memories. Of course, if Rooney and I were in the same place at the same time, the universe might collapse on itself due to the improbability of these two dynamic yet opposite forces coexisting in the same shared space.

So if the world suddenly comes to an end tomorrow night at 7, you'll know why. Don't blame me, blame Rooney who is, apparently, Out of [His] Mind.

RANT: RIP Cowboys

I cannot believe that the Cowboys just lost it 20-21 to the Seahawks.
That's all.

RANT: Fox Cancels "The O.C."

We all knew that this day would come, but that doesn't make it any easier. Fox, in its infinate wisdom, has officially cancelled the O.C. Supposedly they will finish out this season in February, with the finale "they have always had planned" which will be "fun" and "emotionally fulfilling". If you can believe Fox, that is.

RANT: Whitney Houston Underwear Sale

I have to quote my friend Lady D here and say "what the hell are we going to do about Whitney Houston? Are we really just going to let her do this to herself? She's a national treasure!"

I thought she was doing better after finally dumping Bobby Brown (it's her perogative, after all), but now it looks like she's gone to Tori Spelling route of having to sell off her personal belongings to make the rent. According to popsugar.com, Whitney is going to sell off a huge amount of her "personal effects," including her Dolche & Gabbana sequined bras.

In case you've forgotten, here are some pics of Whitney:
crack days v. better days.

RANT: Glenn Hollis Found?

Lately I looked at my blog review stats and saw that most people come here for info while searching for "Glenn Hollis" on google. Then I thought, where the hell IS Glenn Hollis? He couldn't have dropped off the face of the earth. Then I found this- apparently Glenn has gone to "97.3, The Coast"- South Florida's Concert and Community Fun Site. The good news? You can listen to After Hours with Glenn Hollis on The Coast from the website. The bad news? The show airs from midnight to 5 am Monday through Friday.

Here's hoping that The Coast appreciates Glenn more than Wash FM!
And that they move his show to a more listener-friendly spot soon.

RAVE: Talking Cats/ RANT: You Tube

Instead of being able to see the greatest you tube of all time from my page, I have to put in a link here to my favorite you tube video. For some reason (maybe because blogger switched to beta?) I am having problems uploading the video.

This video is my favorite thing on you tube right now, besides from all the Saddam Hussein execution videos. 'Cause really, what's better than watching some dictator hanging? I'll tell you- talking cats.

Warning: this video will freak your freak. Seriously. Sit down to watch it.

RANT: Northwest Airlines = Worst Ever

My husband and i just got back from a week-long vacation over the holidays and flew Northwest Airlines there and on the return trip back. Let me take a moment to tell you why Northwest Airlines is the worst airline EVER.

1) Very unfriendly staff. Sure, they do the usual, "buh-bye" when you exit the plane, but while you are on the plane you are treated like an annoying 5-year old. No you can NOT have a snack, they are 2.50 for pretzels and 3.00 for pringles. And no I can NOT check on your connecting flight/gate. GAWD you're annoying, fine, here's the info, but I can NOT guarantee its accuracy. So F u, hippie.

2) Cannot get a flight out on time, even though its the FIRST flight of the morning.

3) All flights must go through Memphis. Memphis is OK, but their airport is ridiculously spaced out. For example, gate B2 is approximately 50 yards away from gate B3. So although it is in the middle of the country, it's not exactly an ideal place to have a hub.

4) Pilots have twitches. I swear to god that twice during a flight the pilot must have hit the steering wheel with his elbow, because the plane swerved dramatically to the left mid-flight and everybody screamed. Screamed for their lives.

5) No one from the airline said a thing to the obese man who sat next to us on the flight out this morning. The man should have had 2 seats. He did NOT fit in the airline seat, was spilling out onto the aisle and onto my husband, and could barely wrestle the seat belt around his girth-y middle.
Afterwards, while I was soothing my husband as he uttered "I feel..... so..... cold inside....," I told him, "at some point the airline needs to tell him that he has to start buying 2 seats." To which he answered, "at some point people need to consider their surgical options."

6) Although I know this has NOTHING to do with Northwest Air, the people on our flights were among the most annoying I have encountered in a while. And because a) I think that the people that frequent a business reflect on the business and b) it was really really annoying, I'm going to bitch about it for a while.
1. For starters, there was the morbidly obese passenger.
2. Today, there were also about 35 screaming babies on the flight. Alls I know is, if I just had a baby a month or so ago, any relatives that want to see it for Christmas can come to me. TO ME.
3. There was also the "Spanish family reunion" sitting behind us today. I have no idea WHAT they were talking about (because I don't speak Spanish), but I do know that the family of 4 (mom, dad, and 2 teenage sons) were speaking when we boarded the plane, through the flight, when we got off the plane, and while we were waiting for our luggage. I don't have that much to say to ANYone, much less my family. The only thing I understood was when they started listing countries. No shit, they started naming countries. "Puerto Rico, Costa Rica, Nicaragua, the Bahamas..." This went on for a long time. If you are naming countries, I think that you must just like to hear yourself talk.
4. There was also a nerdy love-connection a few rows behind us, which was quite puke-y. Two overweight dorks with their backpacks exchanging contact info. Looking longingly into each others eyes, starved for mutual nerd attention. Gag.


So along with boycotting 97.1 until Glenn comes back and Delilah is kicked off the air in DC for good, I think that I will also boycott Northwest Airlines. Because there was absolutely nothing pleasant about it, and there are enough airlines out there to choose from. Plently. Lets start with the As: American Airlines, Alaska Air....

RANT: What Interest Rate is a "High Interest Rate"?

I should always copy or mail MSN money articles to myself when I see them, because I can never find them again later- they disappear into the MSN black hole/vortex. So of course now I can't link you to the article. You'll just have to trust me. (ha)

I was reading one yesterday about how to "give your kids a million dollars." Basically they told you how much you needed to invest when your child was born, and monthly payments into the various accounts per month, to give your kid a million dollars (approximately) when they turn 18. I thought the whole idea was pretty interesting. There was also a column for how much you had to give if you didn't start saving until the kid was 5, etc.

Then there was a disclaimer stating that until you have your high interest rate debt paid off, this isn't something you should be thinking about doing. So what qualifies as a "high interest rate"? Anything above the going market rate for a mortgage? How much higher? Obviously 5% is low and 20% is high, but there has to be a commonly accepted formula for what counts as high interest.

The whole thing was depressing.

RAVE: @^$%'n Quebecois

There is an excellent article today from the Washington Post's website called In French Speaking Canada, the Sacred is Also Profane about Quebecois swear words. Apparently, when something bad happens, the Quebecois shout their favorite Catholic word, such as "Communion!", "Holy Host!" or "Tabernacle"!

From the article:

"You swear about things that are taboo," André Lapierre, a professor of linguistics at the University of Ottawa. In the United States, "it is not appropriate to talk about sex or scatological subjects, so that is what you use in your curse words. The f-word is a perfect example.

"In Canadian French, you have none of the sexual aspects. So what do you replace it with? You replace it with religion. If you are going to use a taboo word, it would be anything related to the cult, to Christ, the Communion wafer, Jesus Christ, vestments, and elements of the altar like tabernacle. There's quite a few of them."

However, apparently this doesn't carry over to the rest of the Francophone. The article reports that French visitors are surprised at these swear words. Lapierre credits this to the fact that the French have long been away from domination by the Catholic Church.